They've come to take me away
by XxGazeRockIsNotDeadxX
Summary: It starts out like any other day but then some guys in white show up and things start to get a little strange. Undertaker is taken away to the "funny farm". Follow his adventures as he gets in and how it works out. Rated T because I want to... Please review and tell me what you think.
1. Prologue

**Hello. As you can see this is my first story to please me nice. So here it is. I hope you like it. **

**Disclaimer: I don't own Kuroshitsuji. **

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Prologue

One rainy London day was like any other. People went about their business but there was one difference that only the Underground knew about, a series of murders. Now normally the police would handle matters such as this but this was not a matter that they _could _deal with.

The murders had gone on for several months and they still haven't caught the culprit. Now when they can't contain it that's when the queen steps in and uses her force. Her Guard Dog, Earl Phantomhive. By now he should have gotten the letter asking for his help. He orders his butler to get the carriage ready and they head out.

First off they will go to the crime scene and look for clues when none are found, and even if there was, they go to their information broker. His shop was located on the far side of the city yet he still gets all kinds of business but that's understandable seeing as he's the only one in that trade.

The Earl and his butler get to the shop and stand there staring at the sign.

"Sebastian, who's going to pay him this time?" The Earl asked his butler dressed in black

"Depends Young Master on if you have anything in mind to get some good information from him. I always have something to give him." The butler, Sebastian answered with all respect. His answer was received with a glare.

"Whatever Sebastian, just do it."

"As you wish." The butler held open the door for his master and they walked into the shop to get the information they desired. And this is how our tale begins.

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**So I know its short but I mean come on its a Prologue what did you guys expect. So anyways please review and tell me what you thought. Thanks. **


	2. Taken

**So here's the next chapter. I wrote it up so that you guys didn't have to wait. So I hope you enjoy it. Please let me know if there are any things that need changed. **

**Disclaimer: it's in the Prologue but I'll put it here also... I don't own Kuroshitsuji. **

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Chapter 1

They slowly walked into the shop wondering where he was. They heard a creaking noise, turning they saw the man they were looking for standing by the entrance.

"Why hello my little Earl~ Heheh I knew you would show up eventually. Took long enough though~ So what can I do for you and your butler in black today~? Please tell me you've come to get a coffin~!" The man said walking up to the Earl and got into his face. The Earl rolled his eyes and walked around him.

"No Undertaker I have come for information."

"Yes yes I know~ You know the price though~ hehe so lets hear it, first-rate laugh~!" Again the Earl rolled his eyes.

"Sebastian, you know what to do."

"Yes but could you please step out for a moment?"

"Again?" A sigh, "Fine." The Earl turned and walked out, choosing to stand by the carriage. While waiting a voice rang out.

"Ciel!" He knew that voice... Madam Red, also his Aunt. He turned to her to see her, her butler, Lau and his weird girlfriend/sister... Nasty as that was.

"Hello Madam and Lau." Ciel said looking away. They walked up and looked at the shop.

"What are you doing here Ciel? Such a dreadful place." Madam Red asked looking at the shop in front of her.

"Madam you have to remember that the Young Earl is a dog for the Queen, it's not uncommon to see him in such a place." Lau said. Ciel glared at him.

"As if where you are is any better."

"My place is better then this I have to say. So what-" Lau was interrupted when the ground started shaking and the sign on the shop fell from the booming laughter that could be heard coming from within the shop. Ciel stood there for a moment while the others just looked down right shocked. Then the door opened to reveal the butler with a smile.

"I am finished Young Master, please come in he will answer any questions that you have to ask." he said with a devilish smile. Ciel walked in and looked to see Undertaker drooling on the counter laughing.

"You did a good job Sebastian."

"Thank you Young Master."

"Ciel what are you doing here?"

"Information Madam."

"For what?"

"The recent murders that have occurred."

"Oh..." Ciel turned to Undertaker.

"So what do you know?"

"Everything~ Ehehehe~!" The man started giggling.

"I think he's insane Young Earl."

"Your observation is correct Mr. Lau." Sebastian said. "He is in fact insane but he is good at his job and knows what to look for also he's the only one in this line of work so he knows everything that happens with any body, whether it died by natural causes or if they were murdered."

"I see. So that's why you come to this man."

"Undertaker I need to know everything that happened to the bodies." Finally the laughing stopped and the man walked up to the Earl.

"Tell me young Earl, if you were to kill someone how would you do it?"

"What a stupid question. I would never kill someone to begin with."

"Quite contrary Young Earl. Every human has the desire to kill. They may not know it yet but it's always there. They all have a light and dark side. I see a dark side in you Young Earl. You would kill, I know you would. I can see it in your eyes. So tell me, how would you kill someone?" Undertaker said with all seriousness. Sebastian's face cracked a small amused smile. Madam Red and Lau seemed very taken aback.

"How can you say such things? How would you know?" Madam said glaring at the man standing before he nephew. He looked at her.

"I know because I've been dealing with humans for many a moon young woman. I know how the human brain works."

"You know how the human brain works? Please you don't even know how your works let alone are you sane enough to use it."

"Please don't make assumptions Miss." He turned back to the Earl.

"To answer your question, there is no gender difference. The murderer is not picky on whether his victim is male or female. There is a variety. The age range is all over also. Some are poor, others rolling in wealth. I have to say very unusual. My conclusion is the murderer is just killing at random, they have fallen into a trap that they don't know is there. I have noticed one thing though. That would be his killing pattern. He's sloppy but also clean about it. He doesn't want his victims to suffer but he makes it very painful from the start. His weapon of choice is a knife. He stabs multiple times before finally ending their suffering. He makes sure to hit the non-vital organs first. He want's them to suffer but then again he doesn't. He might have multi personality's. Different versions of himself. It's hard to say though. At the same time he may just be sadistic or he may not be. It's really hard to say. Did I help Young Earl~?" He got his usual grin before turning to the back and leaving.

"Ciel what do you think of this?"

"It's hard to say. With this information I can't really get any clear ideas. It's definitely strange that he doesn't have a gender range or age range. Most murders do but this one is indeed sloppy."

"Yes it's very hard to say." Sebastian agreed. Then Undertaker came back with a jar of dog treats. He sat down on a coffin and started eating them.

"So what have you concluded Young Earl~?"

"Nothing much. You did help Undertaker but with this information I can't make heads or tails of it."

"Yes even I am confused. It's not very often I get confused~ This person has a good idea though. Hide out and then kill whoever comes his way."

"Does he have a common killing ground?" Madam Red asked.

"No, he's all over the place."

"Does he have a dumping ground?" Lau imputed.

"I don't think so. I have a feeling that I'm going to have to bait him out."

"I wish you the best of luck Earl~"

"I thank you Undertaker for your helpful information." Ciel turned to leave when a knock resounded on the door. Everyone looked at each other before Sebastian went and opened the door.

"Yes can we help you?" He asked politely.

"We were called to come to this address to pick someone up."

"Are you referring to a deceased person?"

"No he's alive. Please let us enter." Sebastian complied and moved aside. The two men walked in and looked around with disgust.

"Which one of you owns this shop?" One of them asked. He was tall with darker skin and a shaved head. His partner was lighter in skin tone and had a full head of black hair. Undertaker raised his hand and smiled.

"I am good sir~ May I help you sir~? Maybe to help you pick out a personal coffin~ hehe" Undertaker gestured around him, "As you can see I have plenty lying around."

"No we have not come for that. Would you be so kind as to come with us?"

"Who are you?" Ciel asked staring at them. They had a strange package in their hands.

"I am James. We have come to pick this man up." The dark bald one said pointing to Undertaker.

"Oh~ Can I ask why the nice young men in the clean white coats what with me~?"

"We are to take you in for evaluation. Even if you disagree, we are to take you by force if necessary. Get him." The other man went to Undertaker and proceeded to strap him in a strange coat. Ciel was shocked.

"What the hell are you doing?" Before either man could reply there came a laugh.

"They've come to take me away. Away to the Funny Farm where life is beautiful all the time. hahah~"

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**So here's the end. I will try to get another chapter up but I'll be leaving town this weekend and be gone for two weeks with no internet so I hope to get something up but I doubt it. Hope you enjoyed it. Please tell me what you think please. Oh and this story is sorta based off of a song. I have no idea who sings but I thought it sounded like Undertaker so I hope it works out. **


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